Hey everyone. Welcome back to the practitioner's podcasts. We're applying Jesus' style disciple-making to everyday life. This episode and all of our episodes are powered by navigators church ministries which focuses on helping churches make disciples who can make disciples for more information check out navigators church ministries.org.

Hey everybody. Welcome back. My name is Tony. If we haven't met yet I am one half of the tandem of the practitioners podcast. And for the last two weeks. Well last week and this week we're doing something we've never done before which are solo episodes where we're talking about an area of disciple-making that kind of uniquely suits each of us.

So last week on the podcast my dear friend Justin talked about three tips that introvert. Can use to help become excellent disciple makers. Now you guys may find this hard to believe but I am not an introvert. Ah no for real I am the extroverted most extrovert right. when we talk about the scale I'm usually off the charts.

I love to talk. I love being around people. I love being in relationships. I love being loud and verbally processing. No. So that's great. It's one of my gifts that God has given me and I'm extremely thankful but when it comes to disciple-making being an extrovert can sometimes be problematic. And I know what you're thinking right?

If you. Think about extroverts as just talkers then I'm being relational. Then that may feel a little out of the ordinary. Right? Well why do extroverts have a hard time being disciple makers and ordered to illustrate my point on this? I'd like to tell you a little story. my very first guy that I ever decided.

his name was Jeff. He's a phenomenal guy loves Jesus loves following Jesus. And when he and I started meeting together I realized something very quickly. Jeff is a scientist and he is not an extrovert. And so one of the things that would happen is when Jeff and I would meet and I would share with him.

ways that he could follow Jesus more clearly and we would just talk and we would just get to the heart of things. We'd have great amazing conversations. And we did this week after week after week after week. And so for about I don't know probably nine months Jeff and I met on a regular basis and it was great.

And I really grew close to Jeff and Jeff really close to me and it was just really good dialogue. And then it. Time where I felt that Jeff was ready to reproduce. Right. Which is the ultimate measure of a mature disciple-making reproduction. Right. Go and make disciples Matthew 28. And so I said okay Jeff we're ready to go make disciples.

And and he said well I don't know how to make disciples. And I said well you may not have known this or not. Right. Like I felt like I was real smart at the time but I have been modeling for you how to make disciples the whole time. And he goes Tony the only thing you've done is sat down and talk with me about faith.

I can't do that. I'm not you. I don't process that way man. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I wasn't discipling Jeff with ways that were reproducible for him I was discipling him out of my own personnel. And and guys I'm going to tell you that that's a real problem especially for extroverts because a lot of us extroverts have a lot of personality and we wanted to make disciples out of our own personality.

And so we'll just kind of talk our way through this situation. And so as we begin to think about three keys to helping extroverts become excellent disciple makers we're going to talk about some of the things that we can do as extroverts that are uniquely gifted for us. If we do them well should be able to create disciples or that they're introverts or extroverts.

Now if you're an introvert and you've made it this far in the episode first of all thank you for listening. And I want you to know that this is important for you because there's gonna come a time and a place and a day when you have to disciple an extrovert. And even though you're not an extrovert these are some of the pitfalls and some of the keys that we need to make sure that you're going to have to lean in.

Now if you haven't listened to this podcast before we talk about something very specific called the intentional and relational scale intentional and relational I imagine intentional all the way to the left relational all the way to the right civically. We tend to lean one way or. Most extroverts in my experience tend to lean on the relational side.

And so in doing so we struggle on the intentional side. So we're going to talk a lot about that. If you haven't yet really spent some time praying and talking to God about where you are in the spectrum. I want to invite you to just hit the pause button and think am I more intentional? Like do I have to have a plan for everything or I'm a more relational?

Do I just kind of fly by the seat of my pants? And I will tell you if there's one major flaw in all of my disciple-making it's that I love to fly by the seat of my pants. Just talk through it. Cause I'm a talker and I love to talk to people. And there's nothing wrong with that but I want to make disciples who can make disciples for generations.

And in order to do that I have to do it a little differently. So let's jump into the very first key right. Three keys to helping extroverts become excellent disciple makers. The first key is this disciple in Jesus's image not your own disciple in Jesus's image. Not your own. All right. First Corinthians 11 one Paul says follow my example.

As I follow the example of Christ. Paul is saying in this text follow me as I follow Christ that we're all trying to strive to follow Christ which means do not do personality based. Disciple-making do Jesus based. Disciple-making. That's why we add the tagline to this podcast. Applying Jesus style disciple-making to everyday life because we want it to be Jesus style.

Jesus led Jesus. Centered. And in order to do that we have to look at not just the words of Jesus but the practices of Jesus the intentional time in prayer the intentional time and community when Jesus called us first disciples he said come and see. And he showed them where he slept. Right. Jesus was doing life on life.

This is much different than cultural. Disciple-making where we're just doing it on Sunday mornings or a Bible study. Okay. And none of those things are wrong. Right. But we want to get past cultural disciple-making into Jesus style. Disciple-making. And so as you look at the life of Jesus we want to look at Jesus's kind of process.

Now we go back to that scale idea intentional versus relational. Jesus was a master at both. He was relational in the sense that he was doing a life with his disciples intentionally. And the fact that anytime he preached something he would pull the disciples aside and then he would teach them what it meant which is a beautiful model.

Right. So as we begin to think As extroverts we're going to model in Jesus's image. We have to figure out what the plan is. Jesus clearly had a plan right? There was seasons of waiting. There were seasons of of intentionality. There were seasons of all of these kinds of. Tools that we talk about in the disciple-making process that Jesus gave his disciples so that when the time was right he could send them out to do the work of the kingdom of God.

So the first key disciple in Jesus's image not your own the second key and this one's really important. If you're a guy or girl like me create a plan separate from your past. Create a plan separate from your passion. So planning is one of those things that. Intentional people are really good at and relational people can sometimes struggle with.

When I sit down with someone I love to kind of play conversational judo right? What are you going to give me? What are you going to take? That's why I love podcasting because I get to sit down and just talk. And my plan is somewhat limited but this is what I'll tell you. The best podcasts I do over on the reclamation podcast are the ones where I have a basic plan.

And I develop that plan before I get into the conversation. So that way when I get passionate about a topic when I get passionate about an idea when I get passionate about whatever it is my passion doesn't carry me away from what the purpose of the conversation is sometimes. Relational extroverts can get so excited that the passion becomes the entire purpose of the conversation.

So here's a great example. I have a dear friend of mine who were taking through the gospels for the first time and I love listening to him. Talk about the gospels. Well when we sit down for our intentional disciple-making time if if I don't create a point. Separate from my passion. If I don't create a plan ahead of time if I don't create a plan that is intentional and allows me to think through what our desired outcome is.

Then we will end up talking about scripture the whole time. Now that's not bad. Right. Hear me when I say that talking about scripture the whole time is not bad but I'm not talking about scripture for the sake of disciple-making. I'm talking about scripture just to dive into scripture because I love to talk about scripture.

I'm passionate about the gospel. So you get me into the gospel of John and next thing you know we're doing a word study on John one and we didn't get to where we need to get to to give him a tool. And. Fortunately or unfortunately I've got a lot of education around scriptural study but yet most disciple makers aren't going to have that.

Right. So we've got to create a plan for every time that we meet now Justin he always challenges me on this and I'm super thankful for it because when he challenges me on it what it does is it forces me to create a plan. Before I actually sit down to the. And so I'm I'm giving some intentional time intentional thought intentional planning into every disciple-making meeting beforehand.

And I'm going to tell you a disciple makers. I'm going to tell you another gift that this gives you. This gives you time to pray. This gives you time to pray pray about the meeting pray about where God is calling you to pray about what needs to happen. Now. I also want to be clear. Sometimes plans need to do.

Right. So you're going to get into the meeting and maybe something happened and his or her life and you need to deviate go ahead and deviate give yourself permission but don't throw away the plan. The plan is still good right? We want to get the certain things right? We talk about scripture memory as a tool.

We talk about you know all the different tools from navigators church ministries. We talk about all those different tools. We need to give tools in order to equip the future. Disciple me. And so we've got to create a plan to put those tools into the conversation. We've got to create a plan in order to get to the dialogue about the Trinity and you know what transformational things that Jesus wants for us.

We've got to create a plan. If we want to talk about sin and character development you know those are all things that require a plan. So plan ahead of time and then use that planning time is also prayer time and see what God does the next time you sit down to meet will there be times of deviation? Of course there will but I promise you if you get intentional about your plan separate from your passion it'll create huge dividends down the road and your disciple-making relationships.

Okay. The third. Area which I love is. And one that I have to work on all the time is listen twice as much as you speak. Now James one 19 says my dear brothers and sisters take note of this. Everyone should be quick to listen slow to speak and slow to become angry. Quick to listen. Oftentimes as an extrovert one of my major growing edges.

Is that I'm quick to talk and slow to listen. I'm the opposite of what James suggests because I have so many words that I want to use and I love being around people and none of it is coming from a horrible place. Right. I I don't judge myself for this. This is how I'm wired. This is part of my gifting but it requires me to go into a relationship.

And decide that I'm going to be quick to listen and slow to speak. And so my goal when I get into a conversation is to listen twice as much as I speak in any disciple-making relationship. I know I'm not going to have problems using words and all the extroverts said amen. Right. What what I do know is that the person that I'm talking to may have a hard time.

So I need to be intentional about listening twice as much as I speak. Now if you're meeting with somebody who maybe is an introvert and maybe you're an extrovert it's really easy for your personality to just become big. At least it is. My my personality can take over a conversation. And while that's fine in some rooms when it comes to disciple-making I'm not doing the person I'm discipling any favors right.

I'm not helping them grow in their relationship. So listen twice as much as you speak. And what that requires is good question to ask. Now we we've talked about that before on this podcast. We know that question asking is an incredible tool but extroverts listen to me you must ask questions and then here's the important part shut.

Shut up and listen. Right? Listen for the answer because God is going to reveal and that person's going to reveal where they are on their walk when they answer. And if we as extroverts talk over them if we as extroverts just step over their toes or step on their toes and kind of just insert ourselves into the conversation.

We will not hear where God was. He wants us to take them next because in their answers we're going to see future plans right? We're going to see opportunities to make future plans. So we need to listen twice as much as we speak we need to listen twice as much as we speak. The tremendous amount of fruit on this we see in Jesus's ministry right?

When he's talking to the disciples he asks great questions all the time. Who do you say I am now? Who do others say that I am? When Jesus asks questions? You know he does. So for the purposes of understanding and knowing what the disciples. And this is a great tool for all the extroverts in the room. Ask good questions and you can get good at this.

This is a skill that can be sharpened and you can really lean and grow into this process. So let's do a little bit of a recap here. The three keys to helping extroverts become excellent disciple makers. Number one disciple in Jesus's image not your own. Disciple in Jesus's image not your own. Number two create a plan separate from your passion plan ahead of time.

Create prayer time in that point in time. Be intentional with your plan and listen twice as much as you should. This is just I mean this is probably good for any relationship that you're in. If you're a strong extrovert like I am listening twice as much as you speak is good because you're going to speak right.

You're naturally defaulted that way. And there's nothing wrong with that. However the fruit that you seek is on the other side of listening not on the other side of talking so extroverts and introverts and all the people that are listening I just want to encourage. Encourage you to do a little bit of self assessment.

Are you an introvert? Are you an extrovert? Are you discipling someone who's an introvert or an extrovert? And if you are what do they need that you don't have? And how can you lean into it? I was having a conversation with recently with someone about this idea of disciple-making. And one of the things that he said that has really stuck with me is that nothing has transformed me like making disciples.

And as I thought more and more about that I thought why is that such the case? And the truth is is that if you want to be a good disciple maker you have to do what Jesus did. And that means caring more about the person in front of you than the person in the mirror. I don't know where you are in your faith walk but what I know is is that if you're listening to this podcast and you're praying about making disciples then the best way to do it is to meet them where they're at not try to make them fit the mold where you are meet them where you're at walk alongside them and see what God does to build the team.

Today's episode takeaway extroverts can be powerful. Disciple makers. Extroverts can be powerful disciple makers and I'm excited to hear some of your stories about how extroverts are using these keys in their relationship. The action step for my extroverts slow down. Be intentional and create something reproducible.

Slow down. Be intentional. Create something reproducible guys. Gals. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen today. Thank you. If you've already subscribed to the practitioners podcast we're so thankful for you. If you haven't subscribed yet. Go ahead and hit that subscribe button right now wherever you listen to podcasts that way you don't miss any of our future episodes.

We're at episode 29 of the season we're going to do 30 episodes in the season. Take the summer off. Then we'll be back next season with a brand new episode. The only way to make sure that you don't miss new episodes. Hit the subscribe button. Also if you could leave us a rating or review on iTunes it really does make a difference.

Getting the word out about what God is doing on this platform. And finally share this episode with a friend maybe somebody who you know that's an extrovert that needs to just slow down be intentional and create something reproducible. Hey we're thankful for you. We're thankful to be on this journey together.

Can't wait to see what God does next. We'll talk to you guys real soon.